The war of the Bernsteins -- Bobo the self-hating chimp -- Somebody up there likes you -- Heimish knows all -- Holocaust tips for kids -- Waiting for Joe -- Startling revelations from the lost book of Stan -- One death to go -- The metamorphosis -- Prophet's dilemma -- They're all the same -- Smite the heathens, Charlie Brown -- God is a big, happy chicken -- It ain't easy bein' supremey