What do law professors do all day? -- Where do law professors come from? -- Pleased to meat you, hope you guess my name: preparing for (and surviving) the AALS hiring conference -- The on-campus interview -- Which one of these is not like the others? advice for nontraditional faculty candidates -- Offer and acceptance: handling job offers -- Now what? things to do before you teach your first class -- Converting an unsuccessful job search into future opportunities -- Bibliographical essay: a primer on law review submissions from resume to CV